I remember so well as it was yesterday even though I almost forgot for that moment. I've been busy during that week, obvious. (By the way, I do remember the day but just forgot which year).
Well, on Wedensday, Sept 27th, 9:05am, I left the classroom and went back to the dorm. Feeling helpless, empty, and pain, I was so much in deep and dark beneath the ocean that I couldn't find a way out. So despreately, I look around and found a razor. It's the day that I *almost* killed myself. Somehow my body froze, no matter how much I want to kill myself but my body froze. I did respond in my brain "I want to ended this, now!!" Yet, my body still froze. My arms and hands wouldn't moved Frustrated, I don't remember how I ended up standing in front of the mirror. I stood there stare at the mirror into my own eyes. I said to myself (or rather, it's my soul), "FINE! I will go and find someone for help and if that person isn't there, I will come back and kill myself. Do NOT try to stop me, again!" So, I went off to knocked on the door and hoping that she would not answer the door. I was so hoping that she isn't there. Unforunately, she's there. I remember how much disappointed I was because I already determine to kill myself. *sigh* One thing lead to another and ended up to talk to professor counsler. I also remembered that the counsler did asked me if I want to go to pyschology ward (that's mental instution), I refuse to go! I almost panic when counsler asked me that, For a brief seconds of thought I would be force to go. (I looked back, I didn't realize until now that is sooo funny part.) The counsler assurance me that I do not have to go if I do not want to. I was relief. *sigh*
There's another bad news on the next day (technically 2nd day). I remember that night Sept 28th, my roommate invite me to come to meet her friend and get together to do homework. We were planning to help her to do the homework together. There are so many people in the bedroom. My roommate and I were the only one who doing the homework. Everybody chatting and talking. I was being introuduce that girl's roommate's boyfriend (not my roommate). I strongly remember that it was Thursday night about 10pm or so. That guy was so friendly and seem very sweet. I was kinda surprised by that because most foregin I know tends to be shy and quiet type but not that guy. I only met him once. I left because too many people talking. It's annoying. My roommate decided to stay. Although I wished that she didn't because of late night and walking alone isn't always that good. However, I didn't stay. I went off alone to my dorm. I was doing my homework for another couple hours alone without so many people chatting around. However, there are several people comes in and out like something is wrong. I stop one girl and asked her "what's going on?" She said, "I don't know. All I know there is some kind of accident happen in the freshman dorm" (that's the dorm where I was at before I left.). I assume that it is nothing but a freshman kid is having overdose of drugs or acholocal. So, I just ingore and continue to do my homework for another hour or so. I was surprised that I manage to do my homework even though there's a deep pain in my heart. It wasn't easy. I know that but I did what I could do.
The next day on Friday morning Sept 29th is my birthday. (yeah, it's amazing that I almost killed myself two days before my birthday.) I recieve the bad news, there's a murder happened in the freshman dorm. I was shocked and stunned to find out. That's the dorm I came out when I left. Shudder to think that I could get killed or murdered that night. I find it ironic that I have no problem to kill myself but I do have problem if somebody killed me. Ha! I guess that because I do not like somebody use me without my permission to do so. It has to have my permission, first. Anyway, there's a lot going on around on campus police then later FBI involve. There are so many talks, concerns, and worries of what going to happen next and who would be the next victim. I choice to stay most of my times in the dorm at evenings and night becasue that guy was killed around 7pm or so. Few weeks later, there is a guy being arrested. Could not find any guilt or DNA matches so they let him go but as primary suspect. The college kicked him out because of many people are afraid of him and thinks that he's a killer. My guts tell me that the police and FBI arrested the wrong man because there isn't DNA match. I know that he's innocence. I was disappointed that many people are already afraid of him. Funny thing is that I never met that guy.
Second semester came, I knew if the killer is still around, there will be chances that it will happen by end of the Feburary. Same thing that happens end of September so it has to be end of Feburary. If that killer is a serial killer would tend to be same pattern such as same blond hair women age btwn 20 to 25 over and over. Or special dates such as Hitler's birthday every year. There are so many ways. So I figured that he would kill again anytime soon. I made sure my dorm is locked competely. I refuse to go to use restroom until mornings sinc e the killer would do at night. The killer did killed the 2nd guy by last week of Feburary. I knew that would happen if FBI haven't caught the right killer. Sadly, there is another guy got killed.
What ticked me off? That killer is only killed these men is just for the money. When they recieve and SSI first of the month. So, he killed those two man and steal the check and credit card and use it! MAN! Why didn't the FBI and police checked that??? That would prevent from killing 2nd guy. The 2nd guy would have lived. *sigh* They arrested the wrong guy the first place. Geez, I don't blame him for hating that Gallaudet because of that negitive experience for him. Gallaudet did send an appolize letter and would welcome him if he decided to come back but he refused. I don't blame him. Now, the right killer was arrested. I didn't recongize the name however, the face seems so familar. My roommate told me that's the guy who's her friend's roommate's boyfriend. I was completely numbed. Few moments later, I realize, OH MY!!! That night was the night of the murder, that was the guy who I shake hands to. He seems very friendly, calm, outgoing, and sweet. I couldn't believe that I shook the hand of the killer on that night around 10pm and that guy killed a guy at about 7pm in the same dorm. *cringe*
I must say this, FBI and police are stupid....*sigh* I know, they are people and that they are humans but still ... letting the killer to kill one more guy. When the trail came, everybody were thrill when the jury/judge said "guilty" on tv. I was relieved that the guy goes where he belong in jail. I wonder, did anybody knows what sentence? I have no idea.
Well, that pretty much sum up for worth of 3 hetic days of my whole life. That's the story that I would like to share and I can posted here. *grin*
Oh, there's more story relate to the about arresting the wrong guy perspective..... that will come to later... Hope that I will remember to post that....
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