Middle

My mom help me to notice something that I didn't notice. That I'm in the middle. I refuse to go to bar places where all the singles or where all deaf people meets at the bar or going to church. All I ever do is go work and then come home. Mom asked me why don't I go one or the other. Thers one good side and one bad side. I told my mom that I didn't go to bar because of smoking bothers me. I even got bad headache and I had to leave early. Mom suggestion about going to church. I told my mom that I refuse to go no matter what! I vow myself not to go except weddings or funeral, something like that. That was it!

Mom said that I can't get a boyfriends or go out as friends if I just stuck in the middle. It had to be one or another. As good or bad... Church or bar. *sigh* Mom's right about that. I didn't notice until she brought that up.

Mmmmm so I need start going to bar?

RL stands for Real Life, I could read 1 thick book per day. Which I did make sure I wasn't do much on Saturday and I finished read New Moon after I read Twilight. Jennifer, you're right. It is good!

I was so hoping to finished reading Eclipse on Sunday for one day. Unforunately, I couldn't find in 2 Targets and 2 Walmarts and Barnes & Nobles, all were sold out. I couldn't believe it took me all day on Sunday. I finally decided to make one phone call at other Target that I haven't checked and decided not to waste my gas. Turn out that Target does has it and it is last one. I request to put on hold. After dinner, I went and bought it!

I knew the 4th book called "Breaking Dawn" were sold out except Barnes and Noble. So, I went to Barnes & Noble on Wedesnday and it is only 3 books left. So, I grab one!!! Meanwhile, it took me one week to finished "Eclipse" because I have to work, laundry, and take care of Reese. So I didn't have a lot of time with my book.

So far it is soo good. I couldn't wait to start reading my "Breaking Dawn" I sorta wish that wasn't last book. So yes, I want it continue more Twilight Saga.

Last Sunday, we went to see King Tut. I was exciting to go as much as I was exciting to want to finished reading the last book espeically I know it would take me another week to finish this book. Speaking of Tut, it has a lot of statutes, gold dagger, jars, chests, chairs, and etc. Normally, I just glance the shape of stuff and skimming through descprtion what's it about. This time I appreciate the history and escpecially the art work. I was so amazing. I see turtles, birds, goats, ducks, and etc. What's amazing me some are small writing as using toothpick on a stone. I wonder why perfume oil is more vaule than gold? Is it because oil is sacred?

Anyway, it took about 4 hours worth of tour if ya taking time to read and study the artwork. It is worth it!

strange dreams

Every weekends, I'm off. I usually set clock alarm for 10am or 10:30am so I wouldn't overslept until 1pm or 2pm. Because if I do that then I wouldn't be able to go to bed early. However, I woke up on my own before 10am. Most of time I woke up around 8am or 9am. That is the most ealiest! It is for me. However, first time in several months, I slept until 1pm. I've used snoozed button for a while then turned off. I had strange dreamed that I ended up in alternative reality. Somehow I been sucked up by strange white and blue whril-pool in the sky at night. I had a dog and a bird. They are with me. It is almost like "Golden Compass" the movie. If ya had seen it then you'll know what I'm talking about. Somehow I was being chase and I have no idea why or how that started. One nicest thing about this alternative reality. Everytime those men chasing me and had passed by me. It is because none of the women had done crime. It is just men. Ironic, I'm still on the chase. The bird is grey and black. It is almost look-like you see on postcard where's snow surrounding and 2 small birds that isn't red bird. It is grey and black. My dog looks like Reese but smaller as Pug (type of small dog). I've been different places. I remember I was surrounding red bricks with nice arch designing. It was still dark but had some kind of light that shines unknown direction(don't know where it comes from). I remember I ended up somebody's back yard. I don't know how I got there. There's a stone written. I remembered I read it and understood what it said and now, I don't remember what it said. All I know that was some kind of clues. I couldn't stay that long. I ended up other people's backyard. One thing I hate the most in my dreams and even previous dream, I could fly but it wasn't smooth. It always awarkard flight and it is bumping. I meant is I could not fly as high as I would like and I couldn't stay same level. It constantly up and down. It is like bouncing in the mid-air as I struggle to even and smooth my flight. It just make it seems impossible. I even have to fight harder by trying to fly high across the tall fence to get to other side. Sometimes I succeed and other times I have to climb. I met someone there. Seemed like he knows I was being on a chased. He called another animals. All the animals approched me. One thing that stands out the most is the moose. Yes, a huge moose stuck his head between small tree as the moose tried to clear away from the leaves off of moose's face and looked at me.

That's was it. I finally got up @ 1pm. I dunno how it ends nor do I know why I was on the run.

Before that dream, I dreamed a different one. I was at the playground alone even though there people there. One thing the differences. There's no children around. That is because playground is made for adult. It is somewhat similar as miltary but not very challenge and yet it is challeging for beginners. I saw a tall roof and opening inside. There's a climbing bars and it is about 4 or 5 stories high. There are about 3 or 4 opening gaps in surrounding. I thought it would be easy. However, I was told that I couldn't pass a line that is on the ground to get to the bars. I struggle to get a foot to reach over withouth touch a ground. If I did then I have to get back in line to start over again.
As I managed to get my foot to touch the bottom of the bar. I was like, "now what?" I have no idea how I got there but I'm already on 3rd stories on the climbing bars. Now, my goal is looking for gaps to get in without worrying about falling if I'm on outside of climbing bars. Somehow I couldn't find it so I climb on different side so I can get a better look from the distance because you can't see up-close. Once I found the gap, I went back exact position where I was then got in the gap and start climbing inside. Once I got on top, something unexpected had happened. The bars went leaning over. I grabbed on hold so I wouldn't fall. The bars stayed in lean position, once I figure it out. I just stepped down and not climbing back down. The climbing bars returned back to it position.

The people saw me getting off the climbing bars, they applud(sp) for me. I stood there unexpected at first the I overcome that part and start bowing from right to left by 3 times.

Afterward, I was planning to go back home. I looked around and realize I was lost. It took me a while to find it. Once I did, it feels so strange and doesn't look like my home. It is small one room house with rotten and white paint chipped off. Even though I'm at home but I know this isn't my house nor my parent house. It is too strange.

I wonder that has to do with my anixity(sp?) about me living alone in apartment without my parents are nearby. I did asked few people I know who I feel comfortable to live with me as roommate by getting two rooms. Of course, they said no. I'm soo tempting to knelt and beg. Oh well. I guess I have to move on alone.

Agility

I think that's the right spelling. It is dog sport. As you might see on TV, there's seesaw, jumping, tunnel, and a poles for zigzag.

I've been searching where I can find get together for me and Reese, my dog. There's dog troop but it is too far to drive espeically when it comes an awful traffic. So I've search thru internet and trying to find something.

I ended up and found agility group meeting and it is not far from my home. I was thrilled when I find that out. I've been waiting for first day of class start.

Last Monday, I finally had a chance!! It was just a beginning. It was fun! I enjoyed. I think Reese enjoyed. She seemed to like to soical with othe dogs, too. It is only 8 of us. That is the max for class. That's nice! It makes more interactive and almost one-on-one tutor. Reese seems learned fast.

When I did at home, she likes that new game (from the Monday taught). I can't wait for new technique next week for Reese.

While I was there I saw 2 border collies, one is black and white and other is reddish-brown and white. They seems smaller than Reese. Resse is bigger. Now I wonder, what is other half of her. I guess I'll never know.

All I know she's very bright and loves to walk and play. She's sweet and outgoing.

***************************

At work, it is most easist task, I ever work! However, it is a lot of work!! It is too much makes it seems impossible to get it done. My boss asked me maybe do some kind of team. In another word, add one more person to do the task. However, that person isn't helpful. All that person was standing there and watching me for few moments then walk away. I was like... "Hello?" I refuse to say anything and minding my buisness. I let my boss or others take care of it. I know if a person didn't do the work, they will fired that person sooner or later.

what's been happening?

Things happened quite so fast last month and this week. Since someone transfer to different dept, other person promoted up. Then I got promoted up. Actually, I work 2 jobs at same time. I couldn't finished in time since 2 jobs were a lot. However, I was told two important task that are primary so I focus on that and able get it done. Just couldn't do other things.

When my allegry is acting up, I do feel exhausted and didn't feel like do anything. No wonder it called hay fever, even though allergy doesn't have fever but it does feel like I'm having cold/flu-like.

I managed to get up in morning to go to work. However, I didn't feel like do my work. When I arrived I spotted another worker and work in my area. I couldn't asked for perfect timing. It is truly a best timing ever! Two of us working and I helped her out. Later I learned that she's going to take one of my old postion while I'm taking new upper position. So I taught her and trained her about my old postion. Meanwhile, one of the team leader took over my "training" her. I didn't care. I know that she's has "contoling issue" and likes to be "bossy". I just let her as long as she doesn't bother me. I mind my buisness. Few days later, that team leader isn't there so I continue train her and teach her how to use a computerize thing. She said it is too much to remember. For me? It only take me a day. That's all I need. I don't need a week of training even through there is. I told her that she will get the hang of it. Just take time.

Second week, I felt so much better. Thanks to allergy pill over-the-counter. Plus, I recuprate over the weekend by doing nothing which is my favorite thing to do... Is nothing...

During second week, I ask that person who's going to take over my old postion to see if she could do by herself without me. Of course, I did stop by couple times and help her a bit. So she wouldn't feel overwhalmed on second day seems getting better. Although, she still seem overwhalmed. I think she isn't use to it. Beside when first time doing that, I didn't had time to have 15 minutes break until about a month. When I got use to it, I finally had 15 minutes break.

Now, I'm able to focus one job instead of two. I'm able to get mostly done. I'm sure I'm able to get it done better by next week once I improved my speed.

Oh I forgot to mention something. I was wrong (or misunderstood) that my parent would move sometimes in Jan or Feb. Actually, it is either March or April. That give me a little bit more time. I have already searching for apartment or rent a room. Rent an apartment is too expensive!! While just rent a room from someone's else house is $200 dollars cheaper.

When I contact several of people thru email, so far, there's no respond. I'm kinda disapointed. But like I said, I'm glad that I still have alittle bit more time.

Also, I did check out other university. Downside is no dorm and very bad area makes it diffcult to find a good place to stay without being too far to drive while other university doesn't have dorm but the area is pretty good and able to find a better area. When I spoke to advisor there. She suggestion to email her of a place and she will let me know which area is good or bad. Sadly other university doesn't.

Mmmmm, I rather live in dorm make it easier on me than living a place where's too expensive. I'm tempting to go where's dorm is at but it isn't best school for me espeically I want excellent reputation. So I'm able to find job better and better paid, too. Lots to think about...

One step at a time...

Celebrate!!!

Guess what?!?!!

My dad got the position... A job!!! They will move to Georgia sometimes in Jan or Feb. So that means I need to find apartment. I'm really nervous!!

Why?

Because, I barely know anyone here and my parent are only 2 poeple in my family that I can depend on and there's no family here for me to depend on in Texas. Oy!

Obama

Wow! He won to be president. I applud(sp) for him even though I did vote McCain. Deep down, I knew Obama will win.

I just hope that he is the right choice that's all.

Personally, I think it is huge mistake.

Again, I hope not for the sake of America.

Here's another bad news, IRS made a mistake back in 2006 and have to pay taxes for over 500 dollars. Geez, what's next?

I asked my mom, "couldn't ya postpone?" mom said, no, for they will have to pay interest rate and due pay is in December.

What a wonderful way for xmas?! Huh?

Yah!!!!

I'm getting raised!!! Ppfftttt cheap .25 cent. HEY!! It is better than nothing. On bright side, during holiday, I get double paid. Hee hee. I can't wait for holiday. Ironic, I use to be dreading to work during hoilday but now, I've realize that is real world. So I'm going to continue. Like I said before, I get double paid means more $$$$$. That way, I wld be able to find apartment and etc. It is best for me to have back-up money for it.

My time is nearly up for my lunch is almost over.

Did u know??

(I didn't either until now) you can skip master degree and go straight to PH.D.

Kewl, huh??

I just visit other graduate university. I'm so glad that I get to visit several universities. There is 2 more that caught my interest... However, I'm going to pick one that is nearby. Yep, there is another one I haven't visit.

Hope for the best but prepare for worst

Yeah, when my mom had heartburn. She thinks that is her stress. She kept trying to explain that she tried her best to think positive but there's part of her also thinking worst possibile couldn't happen the she repeat but she's trying to think positive at same time. I said to my mom, don't u mean hope for the best but prepare for the worst. My mom said yeah! she seem relieved that I understood her.

Here's possiblity of good news, my dad received a phone call from his boss. He told him that there's a guy might have to have early retirement due to medical reasons.

So my dad did contact and had on phone interview. The man told my dad that might be intense training. Since there is differences between heltercoper(sp) and planes. My dad said, not a problem for he had experiences working at Eastern Airlines(same as Delta, American Airlines) until Eastern closedthe man did reponsed COOL! As he sounds impressive.

If the man hired my dad then it would be under same company and the company will pay the moving. Yes, my parent might move back to Gergoria. It will be Northern part where's mountains and snows. Mmmm sounds lovely isn't it? However it is not for certain but highly possible. *fingers crossing*

Even though, my parent moved out. I'm staying here. My mom thinks that school is also free there in Gergoria. I kinda doubt it so I ask a deaf friend who is from Gergoria to make sure, if I live in-state over a year then I will be in school for free. Turn out, that it is not free.

So I'm staying here for real. What makes me nervous is that I'm alone here and what if there's emergency or car break down. Who should I contact to? There's no family here. Friends, I haven't been really close, here in Texas.

Success!!

Finally, we did sold a lot of stuff at the yard sale. However, there's still more left over. We brings those back in the house. According to my mom, there is more stuff in the attic that we want to get rid of.

There's a guy who seems interesting in those stuff. When my dad told him there's more stuff upstair. He said that he will come over and help us... Other words, he get these stuff first before others. Haha.
We can get all the help we need. We got a little over 300 bucks! But we are going to use them for new tires on one car. So we have leftover for one hundred bucks. Since it has been a while that we ate out. So we did. We pick a reasonable price for resturant. We didn't pick an expensive one.
Tomorrow, I'm going back to work. I had hard time getting up this morning. Ugh! Not only that, I've been working at home. Now I'm back to work at work. Blah! No time for recuprate. I had intense dreams about at work. It must be antixity(sp). I hate that for it is recurring dreams. I never had recurring dreams before until now.

Oh, we are going to have one more yard sale this Saturday. It is really helpful when put one dollars to 20 dollars.

My mom wouldn't sale anything that's expensive. From what I understand that we are going to hold them for a little while.

Stressed

Spell backward... "Desserts"... Lots of chocolate didn't do any cure... My mom is seems to be more stress than my dad but then again maybe both is in equal. Just that my dad did managed to hold back and later he will blew up. Which it is not unusual. Right now, my mom and I are on and off aguring. Even though it is pretty good news that my dad recieved phone calls yesterday morning from his boss that he wants my dad to stay for one month. It is not going to be easy road.

Right now, our goal is to sell the house. This Friday and Saturday, we are going to have yard sale again but this time the cost will be 20 dollars or less. Anything to sell quickly as possible.

Meanwhile, my mom wants me put certian oil paintings and etc to have it sale on Craiglist. Since I've been trying to take a picture by getting better lightening than using the flash. Because the flash makes the oil painting glare and couldn't hardly see the pictures itself. So I have to move around. My mom didn't like it. In fact, she starting to fuss at me. She said forget the craiglist.

I was like... okay... I'm trying to help but it did no good. I did promised to put it back the way it was but... my mom wouldn't let me talk. She said that if I open my mouth one more time then she'll going to scream. I just rolled my eyes and walked away.

There's another example. My laundry day is usually Sunday evening and Dad's Sunday morning and my mom is Monday. My mom interpruted my laudry day on Sunday. So I started on Monday. My mom fussed at me and tell me that is her laundry day. I told her, that she's interpruted. Then she said to me that all I want is to agrue. I was like, GEEZZZ.

Today, I suppose to be helping around the house but I couldn't stand being around my mom. So I ended up going to library and write this and explore internet and checking emails and etc.

I wish I have my own special's place where no-one is around. And I'm not talking about the park or library. I'm talking about like nobody is around, not even walking by and etc. I want to go where I could have a paradise of private propety that I own and no one knows where it is. And maybe have some kind of miniture cabin or cottage that is size of one room like an old-fashion one room red school back then. Just seprate with large bathroom. Would be nice!!

It has been over an hour and I better go.

unsuceeded

No wonder why!! Somebody had removed several of our yard sale signs!! What an assholes!!??!

update

Consider yourself luck that your parent is still living under the roof in their house.

Right now, we are at higher risk of becoming homeless and bankracpty if we didn't sell the house within by end of December.

Today, we are having yard-salel. My mom is in heart-wrenching to sell the good stuff espeically the french-country oil painting. It is my mom's favorite. I asked her if she want me to buy it. She said no since I'm in the same situation. She's right. I have to save my money.

Right now, it has been over an hour and no one is stopping by. They just drive by and looked. There's one car drive by about 6 times. Mom said they are trying to steal it. If both is bored and decided to stay inside.

If that doesn't work, I'm going to try on ebay. I never done on ebay before. Any suggestion of how's that work or start it up. Mom said she don't have time to do it. I'm going to give it a try. I may start french and french-country oil painting on ebay.

Damn it!! I saw the house for sale and it is right next to us.... There is another house for sell few door next to us. That house has been trying to sell for over 3 months now.

Mom said, we may have to pack our clothes and leave until the first payment didn't pay, that's when the bank foreclousre it. We just take what we got. My mom dislike the idea but we may go back to poor white trash living in tailer(sp). We did lived like that long time ago. Just that mom wasn't her idea way of ending retire and too old to go try start over again. Since my parent had worked so hard to build up and going up the stairs to have better life than their parents. Now, they may go back to rock bottom.

One man did came and check out and he said, those stuff are way too nice to buy. He's look for some kind of junk. Haha. However, he suggestion craglist. I had forgotten about craiglist since it is free to sign up for it. So, once bring those stuff in, I will take a pictures. If anyone curious, or might be interesting to buy. Let me know before I post on craiglist.

just find out: part 2

My dad is force to retire since there's no other job availablity. Mom said move out anywhere they want but question is where... And my dad may have to find another job since they do not have enough from 401K retirement money......

just found out...

At first, I was getting alittle exciting about going to Atlanta. In fact, I'm going to get to see that cute 2 months old baby girl that my cousin had. She also had two boys. She mention to my mom that she never had seen all that pink before in her life. I remembered. That's first thing I bought is purple! Purple pants with purple and pink flowers top. There's purple/blue/pink flowers for whole body and footies. And I bought purple booties to matches. All are same company from pooh bear. I just couldn't resist. I got purple overall and bedige top with lace-collar. And a sweater-jacket that is purple/pink/blue shade. They're beatiful!!

I came home from work and show all those stuff to my mom and etc. We were talking about plans and what to wear while we are there and etc. Mom did her laudry and I did mine and plan to finish up on Friday.

However, my dad just receive news thru email before dinnertime, today. That news could cause my dad an early retire or transfer different job but either way, they are going to move out ASAP. So we can't go and visit Atlanta. Since, we have to save money.

Beside, I don't want to move out. However, economy is bad. The college might not be free, anymore.

*sigh* I better go.

oopps & TGIF

Opps about printed "no title..." Twice. I do not have time to search and delete one. Then again, I might not.

I'm just grateful that I'm off on weekends now. (I dunno abt future but right now I'm just grateful).

Thank goodness that today is Friday! YAH!!

I'll be busy this weekend... Cuz soon, we are going to Atlanta. It looks like it is going to be for real. We are going to leave on 18th.

no title...

Well, I'm just glad there's one wasp sting and not 2, 3, or many. Ever since I've been sting, all I want is itch. Man! It drive me crazy! I use anti-itch creme. It helped for little while. Plus it is sore on my shoulder. I usually carried my purse on left shoulder where's I've been stung at. Now I'm carry my purse on right side. To this day, it is still sore and still on and off itching feeling. That wasp sure worest than bee sting. You definetly don't want to go thru that.

Meanwhile, I'm still working in the morning. Things seemed finally resolved on it own btwn my boss and his boss. Thank goodness! I've worked more hours. I've been working from 6am to 230pm instead of 6am to noon. It is not so bad once I get the hang of it.

Also, my boss gave me temporary 2nd job since someone had been promoted to work in backroom from 330am and other transfer to different dept. So after I finished my part then I go work on my 2nd job. It is a lot of resonablity (sp) but I can get the hang of it as long as it is temporary, that's all that matters to me. I couldn't help the other things after I finished my part.

So I'm under trained of how to do on 2nd job and get cerificated for it even it is just temporary. This 2nd job is a lot but easier than my 1st job... Maybe I'll try to get that postion. *Grin*

I'm exhausted. First time, I'm working full-time. It will take time for me to adjusted. Also, I go home to take a short nap. Afterward, I had dinner then walk my dog in neighborhood. Other times, like on weekends, I would walk her in mornings and during weekdays, I would walk her in evenings. Again, it does take me a while for me to adjusted. I didn't at first but my parent is willing to help me out. They walked her every other day and I walk her every other day. That way, Reese walk everyday. Until I'm able to do almost everyday and my parent do once in a while. It is nice to have a break for me.

Here's another good news, I finally found DR that accepted my insurance and the bad news, it is long drive espeically when comes to gas. However, I'm going and it will be this Saturday. I will call Friday to make sure that they didn't change their policy. So I wouldn't waste my gas.

Well, that's all for now.

no title...

Well, I'm just glad there's one wasp sting and not 2, 3, or many. Ever since I've been sting, all I want is itch. Man! It drive me crazy! I use anti-itch creme. It helped for little while. Plus it is sore on my shoulder. I usually carried my purse on left shoulder where's I've been stung at. Now I'm carry my purse on right side. To this day, it is still sore and still on and off itching feeling. That wasp sure worest than bee sting. You definetly don't want to go thru that.

Meanwhile, I'm still working in the morning. Things seemed finally resolved on it own btwn my boss and his boss. Thank goodness! I've worked more hours. I've been working from 6am to 230pm instead of 6am to noon. It is not so bad once I get the hang of it.

Also, my boss gave me temporary 2nd job since someone had been promoted to work in backroom from 330am and other transfer to different dept. So after I finished my part then I go work on my 2nd job. It is a lot of resonablity (sp) but I can get the hang of it as long as it is temporary, that's all that matters to me. I couldn't help the other things after I finished my part.

So I'm under trained of how to do on 2nd job and get cerificated for it even it is just temporary. This 2nd job is a lot but easier than my 1st job... Maybe I'll try to get that postion. *Grin*

I'm exhausted. First time, I'm working full-time. It will take time for me to adjusted. Also, I go home to take a short nap. Afterward, I had dinner then walk my dog in neighborhood. Other times, like on weekends, I would walk her in mornings and during weekdays, I would walk her in evenings. Again, it does take me a while for me to adjusted. I didn't at first but my parent is willing to help me out. They walked her every other day and I walk her every other day. That way, Reese walk everyday. Until I'm able to do almost everyday and my parent do once in a while. It is nice to have a break for me.

Here's another good news, I finally found DR that accepted my insurance and the bad news, it is long drive espeically when comes to gas. However, I'm going and it will be this Saturday. I will call Friday to make sure that they didn't change their policy. So I wouldn't waste my gas.

Well, that's all for now.

Scream!!!

Yes, I did screamed! There was wasp building a nest up in the ceiling outside nearby the back door. It increasing by numbers. My parent and I walked back and forth by the back door many times and think nothing of it. Until this afternoon, I was playing with Reese just before going outside. She's very vocal (barking) when it comes to play. As soon as I open the door, she's barking and jumping up and down when I had the ball in my hand. As soon as I start to throw. I felt sharp pain that made me scream. It hit me on my left shoulder in the back. I looked back to see what it was. I saw wasp. I looked up and I see a group of wasps were perparing (about 7 of them) to form into group. I knew I was in troubled. I ran. I told Reese to come. She still thinks we're playing. She's hyper as she running along with me. I went around the house to the front yard. I looked around and didn't see anything. Boy!!! It was extremely pain, burning, stinging, and itching. I refuse to itch nor touch it. Meanwhile, my mom was in the shower, I knew she wouldn't hear me knocking at front door. But I did tried... But didn't work. Lucky, it didn't take long until my dad arrived from work.

Baking soda and ice seems to be helping. However, the singing feeling still going on and off. Feels like being stung again and again. I rather be stung by bee (which happen to be twice) for it only sung once and the pain goes away after put baking soda. This is first time I've been stung by wasp.

No allergic reation... Same with bee. Thank goodness for that!!